kanta ko ngayon...

Stop, Think - Aliya Parcs
here we go again falling in love again
falling in love all over
we though we've seen the end
thought it was over then
but the feeling's back and we're starting over

hanging conversation, silly accusations
we never made it through cos me and you
we never had a chance... and now we're taking another

stop think wait a minute is it love that we really feel
we've been hurting bad we've been hurt before
don't you fall until we know for sure
stop think wait a minute is it love that we really feel
we've been there before we've been through that door
don't you fall until we know for sure

here we go again taking a chance again
finding ourselves together
falling in love again losing it all again
watching the world go by as we're starting over
----
playing the fool together playing the game too long
thought we were wising up but we're starting over
and i don't care if we're wrong

=)

am i in love?

i think not...

after a series of mishaps, i decided to follow my manongs footsteps and be an anti love machine for as long as i can.

cge heres the catch, i went seeing sumone kanina. a friend. well, uhm, i kinda like this friend. but my stupid self had done something that pissed him off. I was sorry, he accepted my apologies, but then again, i cant help feeling guilty.

And yes, because of that terrible feeling of guilt, i am trying to avoid love once again.

I have always known that love was just a word, well, it is "just" a word right? so as the other emotions- happiness, anger, fear etc.

what makes a word important is the meaning that lies behind it.

and so far, the closest meaning that i could correlate with love right now is nothingness, perhaps even madness.

i know through this years i have been sumone who believes in the miracles of love... above all things, love.

Weird how a single mistake i made shifted my whole outlook.

I ask you, Can a saint live without love?

sumthin from ustex daw...

cute.


I choose to love you in silence... For in
silence I recieve no rejection

Nor should I bother of what it is that prevents
us from being together -
its just that we can never be together.

I choose to love you in loneliness... For in
loneliness, no one owns you but I.

I choose to adore you from a distance... For
distance will shield us
from pain.

Still, I love you and I just can't help but do
so...

I choose to kiss you in the wind For the wind is
gentler than my lips

I choose to hold you in my dreams... For in my
dreams, you have no end.

Forever.

That is what you are to me.

In all honesty, I find it hard to believe that I
will ever love somebody
the same way I loved you.

Thanks for the experience, I loved it while it
lasted. I can't help but
smile during those times that you threw me out
of focus - those times
that you made me panic as to what I could do
just to appease your
call.

Thanks for those times that you almost destroyed
my sanity. I always
knew it was done for anyway.

Thanks for all the phone calls, all the emails,
and all the small things that
you did. Without them, I may have not even been
sure that I really loved you.

And most of all, thanks for being honest. Thank
you for putting me back
on track. You would be a constant reminder of a
God's gift.

Maybe you were right:

Love is an attachment... to someone who'll never
be yours.

Love is something we will never have...
something we'll never experience

And I really meant my reply.

The sun maybe up, but the moon does not vanish.
It may wane, yes, it may

even seem to fade. But one thing is certain. It
remains in its sky...

im currently feeling sluggish, bored and totally messed up...

another normal day for me! :p

PAALALA LANG PO HA:

eto eh galing sa isang taong
hindi sa nakikielam...
pero gusto lang makatulong...
(SANA naman)...
at makapagbigay ng opinyon...

uulitin ko lang ha...

wala sanang masaktan...

KATOTOHANAN lang...

______________________
----------------------


HINDI BA KAYO NATATAKOT???...
as in sa mga bagay-bagay...
hello??...
getz,...
saan pa ba..
kundi sa mga LOVE life issues...
na tipong imbis na maging seryosong usapan...
eh nagiging pang-"TELESERYE" pa ang dating...

don't you know that it's not something to "LAUGH"
about...
it involves PEOPLE..
people with feelings...


nws...
ang akin lang naman eh..
based from experiences ha!...


ang love ay hindi minamadali...
hindi pinipilit..
at lalong hindi kina-career...


IT COMES NATURALLY...
(hahaha... take it from me!!!... )


as in magugulat ka na lang isang araw...
magigising na SIYA ang nasa isip mo...
hindi pinilit na isipin ha...
basta NAISIP mo na lang basta...
mapapangiti ka na lang...
at basta na lang gagaan ang pakiramdam mo...
na tipong kahit mukha ka ng tanga...
eh ok lang sayo...
ngiti ka pa rin...

hindi nababase sa tagal ng pinagsamahan...
hindi rin sa dalas ng pagkikita...
hindi rin sa ilang beses na pagkakausap sa
phone...
lalung-lalo nang hindi sa dalas ng pagte-text...

may MAGIC kasi yan eh...
magic na hindi naka-cast ng kung sinuman...
MAGIC na matagal na palang nandun...
hindi mo lang namamalayan...

isusugal mo ba yun???...
yung feeling na sobrang wala ka ng hahanapin pang
iba???...
papabayaan mo bang masira yun???...


ASA PA!!!...


kaya nga eto lang yun eh...
wag na kasi kayong magmadali...


unang-una...

PAANO MO BA NASABING MAHAL MO NA SIYA???...

dahil ba natutuwa ka sa kanya???...
o kaya naman naaaliw ka???...
naswee-sweetan ka ba ng sobra sa kanya???...
kinikilig ka ba pag nakikita mo siya???...
at nahi-high kapag naririnig mo na ang boses
niya???...

eh teka muna...
baka naman infatuated ka lang....
o kaya naman kagaya nga ng sagot mo...
BAKA naaaliw ka lang...
dahil kakaiba siya...
may spark na hindi mo maintindihan...

tsk!!!...
ang saklap nyan!...


pangalawa...

GAANO MO NA BA SIYA KAKILALA???...

madali ba siyang mapikon???...
pano ba siya mabadtrip???...
madali bang mahalata na may topak siya???...
ano bang suot niya pag nasa bahay siya???...
shorts ba o pantalon???...
nakasando ba siya o naka-t-shirt lang???...
matagal ba siyang maligo???....
kumakain ba siya ng vegetables???...
tamad ba siya???...
mas gusto ba niyang manood ng tv kaysa magbasa ng
libro???...
nagpe-play station ba siya???...
tatlo ba ang pamangkin niyang lalaki???...
makukulit ba yung mga kamag-anak niya???...
green ba ang kulay ng gate ng bahay nila???...
sa village ba siya nakatira???...
may sakayan ba ng jeep na malapit sa kanila???...
nagsisimba ba siya linggo-linggo???...
kasama ba yung pamilya niya???...
at nagdadasal ba siya bago matulog???...

in short...
alam mo na nga ba???...
ang mga bagay-bagay...
ang mga simpleng bagay tungkol sa kanya...
na nagdedetermine ng sarili niya...
as in kung sino ba talaga SIYA...


pangatlo...

KAYA MO BA SIYANG TANGGAPIN???...

as in TANGGAPIN ng buong-buo...

sa lahat ng trip niya sa buhay...
sa lahat ng katopakan niya...
sa lahat ng pag-iinarte at pag-dadrama niya...
sa lahat ng kasalanang nagawa, ginawa, at gagawin
pa lang niya...
sa lahat ng naiisip niya...
sa lahat ng sasabihin niya...
sa kilos niya...
sa pananamit pa pala niya...
sa pagsasalita...
sa pananaw niya sa buhay...
sa pagtrato niya sa tao...
sa lifestyle niya...
sa uri ng pamilyang meron siya...
sa uri ng kaibigang kasa-kasama niya...
sa style niya pagdating sa love...
sa kasweetan niyang natural...
sa paglalambing niya...
sa tawa niyang pagkalakas-lakas...
sa manners niya...
sa pagmumura niya...
sa bisyo niya kung meron man...
sa mga pang-aasar niya sayo...
sa style niya pagdating sa pagsolve ng problema...
sa problemang maaari ka ring masama...


pang-apat...

KAYA MO BANG MAGING TOTOO???...

kaya mo bang makita yung sarili mo...
na kasama pa rin siya ha...
sa isang sitwasyong pag naisip mo eh...
mapapaiyak ka na lang sa sakit...
nang dahil din sa kanya???...

kaya mo bang magmukhang tanga...
as in umiyak ng dahil sa kababawan...
ibuhos ang mga nararamdaman mo...
kahit na puro kababawan nga lang naman...
as in kahit sa harapan niya???...

kaya mo bang maging barubal pag kasama mo
siya???...
yung tipo bang wala ka ng pakielam...
mawala man ang manners mo...
na wala ka naman talaga...

in short...

KAYA MO BANG MAGING IKAW KAPAG KASAMA MO NA
SIYA???...

yung tipong hindi ka nahihiyang ipakita kung sino
ka
talaga...

dahil alam mong...


HINDI MO LANG SIYA TANGGAP...

TANGGAP KA RIN NIYA...

BUONG-BUO RIN...


MGA TAO!!!...
tama na kasi ang trip...
tama na ang pagmamadali...
oo masarap ngang mainvolve sa isang tao...
pero diba mas masarap yun...

LALO NA KUNG ALAM MONG TOTOO YUNG
NARARAMDAMAN MO...

im happy...
and im not telling why...

:p

ive been having problems writing a good, sensible journal entry these past few days.
i wonder why.

hmm... there's my exam week. and me, being the great crammer, wasnt able to be a good multi tasker too. So what i did was to sleep, and sleep a lot. Hahaha, weird though, i never did review seriously with my final exams (note: exams all start from the start, bummer, talk about torturing students, o well, life).

So there, second, with my constant rantings about life, the typical love-ish issues i have. Ask Mike, err... Harris, about it. He knows. I dont wanna talk about it here, ill just make a "dramedy" of this entry.

Third, im dang happy... i guess all of u know why now, manong told u all about it. (for those who dont know, dont ask). hahaha. and you know that when im happy, i dont write that much, well, i dont know about u, but that's my case.

------

break

------

singet ko lang.

I miss my class. (im SOCIABLE u know). Cge cge, im guilty of crying these past few weeks because of them. They are the first ones who cross my mind when i wake up in the morning (call me stupid, but im the kind of person that "sticks" around, I trust people, I believe that everything is good). We had our uniforms all signed up, hahaha, weird that we dont even know if we'll pass junior year or not. Too bad i wasnt able to go out with them yesterday at calamba for the class outing (strict parents, haha). good thing karma intervened and balanced my fate (u know how, remember why im happy now?). Our adviser even texted me that she'll do her best to defend our class this monday (deliberation day). She even promised that no one from our class will fail her units. And that she'll defend our class in every way that she can to help us pass. I believe in her. Idol ko nga. Its people like her that makes me want to be a teacher. well, i know that someday i will be. (hahaha, weirder, she was my moms teach before (it was a different school, and she was the dean there), and my adviser still knows my mom till now... aww sweet!)


I dont know why, but i love teaching people. I want to mold minds, i even remember my old theo prof that the noblest proffession is that of an educator, for he/she molds minds, and that his/her influence will not only last for a short span of time, but otherwise. sigh. sooo true.

I wanna make a difference, I will be a doctor in the future, at the same time be an educator, in God's guidance.

wala kasi akong magawa sa bahay e.
saka may nangungulit na mag take daw ako nito. :p
here goes nothing. :p
pa interpret na lang sa kin. hahaha :p

Extroverted (E) 50.77% Introverted (I) 49.23%
Intuitive (N) 54.77% Sensing (S) 45.23%
Feeling (F) 54.61% Thinking (T) 45.39%
Perceiving (P) 54.27% Judging (J) 45.73%




Enneagram Test Results

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